Thursday felt a bit like Christmas day. I felt like I was given a huge gift. A priceless gift. A long-awaited gift.
It was a day of reconciliation.
In 2002 I met a girl at summer camp who was to become one of my best friends---the type of friend who will stay with you in your heart for the rest of your life...whether you are speaking to each other or not. For 4 years we built up a beautiful friendship and learned to lean on each other through thick and thin. We saw each other through hooks ups and breaks up, adventures and trials, good times and bad.
Throughout those years I was changing a lot, as most people do as they try to gracefully leave their teen years behind and become a 20-something with character and poise. Let me tell you, for me that wasn't a graceful time at all. I struggled a lot, developed bulimia, tried hard to define myself by how many friends I had; by how many people "needed me". I guess what ended up happening was that this dear friend of mine felt pushed away and less important or less wanted after awhile. That's really a huge shame because it wasn't the truth at all. At that point in my life I wasn't even aware that I had a problem. I had never owned up to my bulimia, hadn't reached out for help at that point, so I was really messed up.
In 2006 we had a fight. A big, big falling out. I will spare you personal details as I don't want to cross any confidentiality lines here, but misconceptions and miscommunications were flying in each and every direction and it wasn't pretty. There were insurmountable tears on both our accounts and I didn't ever forget that day, because I thought it was the last day I would ever see my best friend this side of heaven.
Years and years passed. Weddings were held, babies were born, life-changing events occurred in both our lives. I never forgot my friend. Her picture was on my fridge all this time. There was a piece of me missing, cheesy as that might sound. I missed her.
A few weeks ago everything changed, and although this doesn't happen often, we reconnected literally overnight. I didn't know what to make of it, but I was really excited and hopeful. Words were exchanged, apologies made, regrets expressed, love reaffirmed.
I saw her on Thursday. In so many ways she is the exact same friend I met almost 9 years ago. 9 years hasn't robbed us of our humour, of our kindred spirits, of our matching personalities. Sure, we may be dealing with a few more wrinkles, a few more years under our belts, some experiences we didn't share and can never get back, but what we have now is a second chance. And I'm not letting her go again because I know that life without her is no life at all.
The most unusual thing happened later that night. I got home late from Brian's birthday dinner, hopped on facebook to check my messages, and another old estranged friend of mine from that same summer of 2002 came online. On a less intense scale, a similar falling out occurred between us and we, too, lost many years of each others friendship. But low and behold, the very same night, we were able to reconcile as well.
It felt like my birthday, only this wasn't a gift that can break or be returned or traded in. It's way better than that. It's friendship. It's sisterhood. It's amazing.
Oh, and the icing on the cake? My best girl is moving back. Life just keeps getting better and better.
Merry early Christmas!!
~C~
